i'm naked inside my fear

October 14, 2002 | 9:15 am
well, so far she's taking it okay. i guess. she emailed me the stuff about the mental health insurance and told me she could make me an apointment with pam if i wanted her to. she asked what was going on, if anything happened, and if there was anything she could do.

so maybe she doesn't know. or, maybe she thinks i'm strong enough to talk about it with her. but i'm not, so i can't.. not now.

i wasn't prepared for those questions, so i emailed her back and told her nothing HAPPENED and not to be worried (although i know she will be, she's my mother) and that if she could call and make me an apt. i'd appreciate it.

and then i cried.

but now i've got to get ready for work - day one of new job (at law office) today. i'm exhausted from the three hours of sleep i got last night, and i fear i won't get any more tonight... AND i have an exam tomorrow.

i need all the luck in the world.

in other news, i met someone. and he's older, yeah, but maybe that's okay this time. with him. i don't know. it's complicated, i guess.

he's insisting i let him take me out and i'm aprehensive only because i know if i give him that chance it's all over from here. so i have a lot to think about.

i'll keep you updated.

laura

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