i'm naked inside my fear

November 16, 2003 | 2:15 am
one down, four to go.

see, i just stayed home on a saturday night to write a theatre paper.

amongst other things. i have four more papers to write.

and you could say i didn't ACTUALLY stay home. i met my parents and my sister for coffee and watched a movie with my sister.

so i came home about an hour ago and sat down to write this paper.

my professor wanted us to email our thesis to her and get a response before writing the paper, but it's due in a week!

i have two papers for english and one for social work left. i also have to write an essay on why i'm interested in going away for school. this essay will be accessable to any college i may apply to. it's not due until december 1st, but it's hanging over my head.

as is school, and everything about it. i'm ready for this semester to be over with. how is it that in one month i'll have finished five papers and taken four final exams? how is that humane?

speaking of inhumane things, i watched the laramie project tonight. i wanted to cry, and if the movie had been done in a better manner i would have. for those who are uninformed, laramie, wyoming is the city where college student matthew shepard was beaten, tied to a fence, beaten some more, and left for 18 hours (and eventually died, after being comatose for days) because he was GAY.

i went to a vigil during the anniversary of his death last year. i heard members of the gay community at my college speak of themselves or those they knew that had been victims of hate crimes, and many of them were physically assaulted.

it's a god damned shame that people can act that way.

i've never questioned my sexuality. it wouldn't matter if i had or hadn't. no one deserves what those two boys did to poor matthew sheppard. and sadly enough, in the film (it was a documentary, but actors played the roles of the people they interviewed) people were STILL talking about hating gays.

it's like some people can be slapped in the face with something and it still doesn't wake them up.

OPEN YOUR EYES.

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