i'm naked inside my fear

September 8, 2002 | 3:13 p.m.
I have been looking back at these entries and have quite often wondered... why does anyone read this? aside from my friends that i have been avoiding (because they have small chance otherwise of knowing that i'm alive still) people from other cities and states and even a couple from different countries have sent me emails about things i've mentioned feelings I've had and all that nonsense. Thanks, all of you, it warms my heart.

I was supposed to run (78888888888888888 -- tequila) a 5K route w/Jeff this morning and didn't wake up until 2:30 (and only then because he'd called and left three messages) but I honestly don't think I could walk a quarter mile right now if my life depended on it.

I am thinking about running a half marathon with my brother's friend Dave in Dallas in November. Actually, Jonathan just mentioned it to me yesterday and said that I could catch a ride w/Dave if I wanted to come. It really depends on the weekend, though, because if it falls at a bad time I won't be able to.

i really love tequila so much. she's gotten to where she likes pony tail holders so much that she'll attack my hair if she can't find a loose one. right now she's curled up in my lap like a good little baby kitty. jen pointed out how random her markings are.. she's white with a circle of grey tabby on her back (though it's off centered), all of her legs are white except for one (the back right one had a stripe of tabby) and her tail is all gray and black. She has a big blotch of gray/black tabby on her head, and her ears are gray but one of them has a white marking on it. the only white on her face is right inbetween her eyes and around her nose and whiskers. after jen and i studied her, jenny says, "she's so random, just like you. two peas in a pod" and i realized that if she wasn't around breaking things and laying all over me when i try to sleep, i'd be so lonely.

right now she's interested in an empty dr. pepper bottle. if i just spread trash all over my apartment, she'd be in kitty heaven.

i'll go for now.. i'm too hungover to form anymore thought process. this has already taken me more than half an hour.

laura

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