i'm naked inside my fear

March 27, 2003 | 5:07 am
it's not like i slept all day. it's not like i can sleep all day tomorrow.

i mean, i have things to DO.

i probably won't go to class, but i do have to go to lockworks to get my hair done at 12:00! and i have to get some groceries and be at work happy and cheery at 5:00pm. i only have to work until ten... i may just stay up until jake wakes up so i can give him a huge kiss.

i think he worried about me tonight. i left his house around 8:45 and had to be at work at 9:45. i told him i'd call before work, but i couldn't find my cell phone as i was running out the door ten minutes late, so i never got a chance. i think he left a message, but i haven't checked. i'm scared it's going to make me feel guilty for being stupid and losing my phone. i'm scared it's going to say that he worried about me and i'll feel so bad.

tonight. it's not even tonight anymore, it's today. the bar was okay, last night i should say. i kept pretty busy and got some big tips from a few good customers. for the most part, though, the tips weren't that great so jen and i each left with $120. that's okay, though. it'll get my hair done tomorrow and pay a bill or two.

i'm rambling. it's 5:12am and i'm rambling about nothing at all. i wish jake was awake so i could bring him coffee and breakfast. i know he's not.

i'm stupid for thinking i can stay up until 6:00. there's not a fucking chance. as much as i want to i know i'll hit the bed and crash.

maybe if i watch my so called life. maybe that will keep my attention.

tequila is in heat. she's crying for sex.

aren't we all? it's spring. it's finally getting warm enough to take romantic walks outside.

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