i'm naked inside my fear

September 3, 2002 | 4:08 p.m.
so this has to be shorter than i want it to be. sorry.

September is the month of hell for me.

Sept 11 was a tragic day for me before all this WTC stuff.. sept. 11 was the day they finally took Tim off life support. That weekend we stayed at Our Lady of the Lake and watched him slip away... until finally the doctor said there was zero brain activity.

I didn't even cry. I couldn't. The tears were gone. In fact, I was furious that he would do that to me after all the shit he saw me go through with james and andrya.

which brings me to the most miserable part of september. sept 26 - the day james died. i was in 8th grade when i lost all of my innocence.

enough of that for now. i still have to make face for class at 6:00.

i decided i'm going away to school next year. no one thinks it's a good idea but me. but hell, i've got to do it one day, and why not now when i have nothing holding me down? no offense, i love all of you guys, but it's not like you all won't be around when i get back. and it's something i need to do for me.

also, i'm going to buy a treadmill thursday. i was going to get it tomorrow, but i'm going out to eat for my brother's bday.

i got my new computer in today, but it's not at my apartment yet. we'll see how that goes.

for now, i've got to bring luke to work and then i'm off to class. maybe i'll dig a little deeper into september later.

laura

"what have i become? my sweetest friend/ everyone i know goes away in the end"

before | after