April 28, 2004 | 9:03 pm
i feel i am at a loss for words.

all i want to do is crawl into a hole and cry and never ever come out.

there's no particular reason, i just feel this way.

i've managed to get myself to do things lately though. last night i managed to go out to eat dinner and go out afterwards for drinks.

i didn't go out before i purged my dinner, though. not so fun to purge mexican food. it hurts. bad.

i've found that i am myself in front of ryan and not in a healthy way. my promise to never purge around him has been broken several times now and it hurts me so much that i cannot even control that urge in his presence.

it makes me feel like i'm getting worse.

am i?

before | after

miss me?

make a difference - July 12, 2007
in short - February 20, 2007
gameday - October 14, 2006
quickie - October 02, 2006
roxie bear - July 06, 2006